Due to actual real life work conflicts, I am unable to post a ‘Film Session’ this week. I know what you’re thinking, “Dammit, those film sessions were the bright spot in my otherwise boring and pathetic work-week life.” I’m sorry if I let you down, but on to obviously more important news.
The obvious big news in the past week has been the emergence of the Buckeyes as the absolute best team in the B1G. This is not news to us Buckeye fans, as we already knew it, but those idiots in TSUN were somehow still questioning our authority over the entire Big Ten. Well Wolverine fans, you’re not back. In fact, you’re not close to back. You haven’t scored a touchdown in two straight games and your QB is really living up to his comparisons to Michael Vick with his untimely turnovers and lack of ability to stay in the game. Two straight games without a TD??? Hell we only had one game without a TD LAST YEAR, our worst year basically ever.
I’m not sure which is more pathetic, your performance since being preseason ranked #8 or the idiots who voted to put you there. One thing is for certain, if you can’t beat T-Tragic and the Bugeaters, XBrax360 and the Buckeyes are going for video game stats on both sides of the ball. Robinson has struggled against any defense with a pulse, and while ours has been spotty at times, they play their best in the big games. There is no bigger game than THE GAME.
Shockingly Bob Stoops and Oklahoma stumbled on the biggest of stages, making this year just like every other year since the year 2000. It simply isn’t a full season of college football until Oklahoma slips up in a game everyone outside of Lou Holtz thought they’d win.
Georgia had already had their yearly slip up, and sent the Gators packing with a solid win after some idiot on Florida thought it’d be a good idea to try and jump straight up in the air at the 7 yard line. I’m not sure if he really thought that would get him into the endzone or he was just trying to pull the latest trend of front flipping over defenders.
Is it sad that Notre Dame is the only big-name team that is actually “back?” I’ve given them a lot of flack over the entire season because, well basically, I hate Notre Dame. It’s about time I go ahead and own up that they may actually be a good football team. Unlike USC and Michigan they have beaten all the teams they should have, as well as the ones they shouldn’t have. Sadly we have to hear Lou Holtz keep lisping away about them on ESPN, but at least we can all agree that it’s better than that douche Mark May having an actual leg to stand on about Pitt.
Some of the best news in an otherwise tragic week for real news: Jerry Sandusky got sent to the prison he deserved to go to.
So now to this week’s x’s and o’s. Illinois comes into The Shoe as the only sub-par Big Ten team that has been more of a nuisance in the past decade than Purdue. They are literally that annoying step child that you just have to deal with being part of the family. In the ’02 National Title year it took overtime to beat them. I know this because I refused to go to my high school homecoming until that game was over with, which I still believe was completely worth it. We then didn’t play them again until ’06, where we only won by 7. The next year they ruined back-to-back perfect regular season with a shocking upset in Ohio Stadium, and a close 7 point win for the Bucks the next year. Illinois was one of the 6 teams we beat last year, but even at 2-6 this year I’m not counting them out.
For some reason we stuggle with Illinois, even at home. Whether this is usually a “hangover game” or we just have a history of playing down to their level, it’s always one on the schedule that true Buckeye fans know won’t be easy. With their two QBs combined for the season, they have only around 200 fewer yards passing than Braxton. As we all know our defense doesn’t exactly defend the pass as well as Brady Hoke ruins “all you can eat” rules at a restaurant. Their tandem at running back is also a threat, as both are averaging over 4 yards a clip. Now I know none of their stats are outstanding, or even noteworthy compared to some of the offenses we’ve played so far, but the fact of the matter is they are Illinois. And for some ungodly reason this game makes all of Buckeye Nation go through heart wrenching ups and downs for all four quarters.
The running game is going to need to be stellar, as there is no better way to humble a potential upset minded opponent than by running it right over their face and stepping on their balls on the way through.
Oh and here’s a guy doing a backflip off a cop car over a cop… for really no good reason, but it’s funny.
Embrace The Hate