Every week Personally Foul gets you caught up with what happened over the college football weekend. This time we are on top of our shit. Enjoy.
The Buckeye remain undefeated and move to 10-0….and it feels pretty fucking good.
Carlos Hyde “Yo Kids” ran wild on the Illini’s pathetic defense to the tune of 137 yards and 3 more TD’s. Heisman next year? It’s in the bag.
Braxton Miller continues to keep his name in the mouths of Heisman voters, passing for 226 yards 2 TDs and rushing for 73 yards and a score. It’s time to say it’s Braxton’s award to lose.
Braxton Miller getting out of bounds. No need to get cute with Illinois. Get what you want and save your body the next two games.
OSU D is peaking at the right time. They held Illinois to 2/13 on third downs. Nothing like playing the (non) fighting Illini to keep the momentum going.
Ryan Shazier is a full-grown man. This motherfucker is an absolute freak and we have a huge man crush on him. If we college co-eds we would be out trying to get pregnant by this guy tonight! He is the best linebacker in the country and was named the Big10 defensive player of the week after his 14 tackle game.
Philly Brown has learned a little something from watching XBrax360 and showed some of his own moves on a 37 yard td catch.
Highlights from the Illinois game:
We are in November and there are still 6 undefeated team left. The rest of the season should be something special to watch.
The Big East has an undefeated team in the top 10. Louisville is 9-0 and looking for perfection. Are you surprised? We’re not. They do have a coach that has come from the Urban Meyer coaching tree. That’s what you do when you’re a Boss.
USC vs Oregon decided to play a basketball game and both offenses combined for 1345 total yards of offense and 113 total points.
Maybe the best DJ in the world right now, Calvin Harris, released his Album 18 Months on October. Do yourself a favor and go to Itunes and by the whole damn thing. You’re welcome.
Michigan State. You had the pollsters fooled into a top 10 ranking and have done nothing, but play like shit since. Sparty has 4 home losses this year and 3 have been in Big10 play. Clearly on the of most overrated team this season.
Indiana at 2-3 in the Leaders Division, still controls their own destiny for a trip to Indy for the Big10 title game. God Damn the Big10 sucks. Fuck you Gene Smith for being so arrogant that you didn’t take the bowl ban last year. Idiot.
Jake Stoneburner. You drive us fucking crazy. You have a great game in (not so) Happy Valley and turn around with a game like you had on Saturday when you could catch a STD at Brothers on ladies night. Ugh.
#7 Supo Sanni Sr defensive back for Illinois had a rough game on Sat. Carlos Hyde looked like he was seeking this dude out just to punish him. #hydeyokids
Miss State = fake good. Just because they play in the SEC doesn’t mean they deserved their lofty ranking. The minute they played a tough opponent they gave up quicker than a Brady Hoke diet plan.
Pac 12 Defenses. We told you in the good about USC and Oregon’s offensive explosions, well that sound you hear is shoe dropping. Pac 12 defenses give up scores faster that a low self-esteem girl looking for somebody to like her.
Arizona. Rich Rod might have beaten an overrated USC team, but they got murdered by UCLA 66-10. Now that’s the Rich Rod we love.
AJ McCarron. You are not a Heisman candidate. Dont let those fuck tards in the media get your hopes up. Yes you are on the #1 team in the country and no you haven’t thrown a pick this season, but you know deep down all that Heisman talk is bull shit right? Look at the bright side, at least you have a hot mom. Just don’t let someone photograph you making out with your mom #southernproblems.
Illinois and Purdue are a combined 0-10 in Big10 play. My God are you pathetic losers. Just save us all the time and quit playing football next year. At this rate we would take Rutgers and Boston College over you.
Colorado Buffaloes. This stat just blows our fucking minds. Colorado, in your last 5 Pac 12 games you have been outscored 261-51. At this rate you might as well join Illinois and Purdue and make a super conference of shit teams.
3 Pitt players have been charged with assault. An eyewitness recognized the players in a police line-up from ”a class on Vampires we had together”. Pitt has a class on Vampires? You know they are not real right?
Jason and Aaron